The year of 2012 was quite the year for me. I know it has been a while since I actually wrote down any of the events of my kinky life and thought I should catch up on that now. The last post was in September of 2011 and many things have happened in that time period to now. A lot of growth and experience have me thinking about things in a new light. To keep everything in order the best that I can, I will start with filling in the rest of 2011 before the entire year of 2012.

2011: October - December

The remainder of 2011 was filled with learning and making new friends for sure. I went to play parties and met interesting people. The dress I made for a comic convention was able to be reused at the Gala at the Mark where I was able to show it off. It was a wonderful way to end the year. I went to another play party in Westmoreland which Im sad to say wasn’t my best experience there. I learned that screaming bloody murder will completely throw off my headspace. I couldn’t even really enjoy my scene I was having as I would call yellow left and right with things I had taken before. I was really disappointed in myself that night and so mad I cried that night. I hated that I felt like I let DK down and hated even more that I could not focus beyond the distractions of the woman in another room. I have just never heard someone scream like that and not call red. It was ilk there was no consideration for anyone else playing and it completely ruined the evening for me honestly. I was very much ready to go home and very must dissatisfied as well. DK and CC have been really awesome to me as I got to play with themThe rest of that year I don’t believe I played much as I became busy with family and friends around the holidays. Beyond that, 2011 was a good kink year for myself and I truly looked forward to the next year.

2012: Oh what a year!

To kick off my kink year, I decided to do the slave auction once more. I made a new outfit with polyester, lace and chain-mail. I looked amazing honestly and that isn’t being conceded at all. I was bought by a well established Domme and Sadist in the community, I completely respect and still squirm in thought about. I was also bought by DK, which brings just as much excitement. That evening I acquired quite a lot of books. Some were just for leisure while other were quite informative. I happened to get a signed copy of To Love, To Obey, To Serve by the Vi Johnson and I was beyond excited to read it. I now have a nice library thanks to that night. I attended Little’s Playdates and Spanking parties that were my usual with a few other events at the beginning of the year. My seamstress skills grew and I made a tiger outfit with fur all over me. The beginning of the year was good but that summer though has to be the best summer I have had in years though. I tried lots of different things that I was unsure about and ended up loving them. The first eye opening experience was the spanking party. That night, however, I was not bottoming to anyone. I was topping for the first time in my kinky life and found it relieving to get that energy out of me. I was co-topping of course but it was enjoyable too. I had accepted a while back that I had top energy but had no real way to get it out of me. After so much build up though, getting it out on soft smooth skin made it wonderful. The next event I got to try was fire play along my body. I was very very nervous but it was the best feeling I ever had. It was very soothing and sensual. I could have laid there for hours honestly. The next thing I tried proved to me that I can truly take way more pain than I thought. I tried cupping and all I can truly say to that is wow. Even now, I still shudder and squirm at the thought of it. It was painful and pleasurable at the same time. I had it done on my back and chest, and the bruises I got from it lasted for a week or two. That summer was absolutely amazing. Later on that year, I was introduced to a cane at a spanking party.The cane… Wow… Im in love with it. I don’t know where the love for it came from but I really do adore it. The thud and sting of it is delightful on my skin. As long as Im not being whipped with it, I really do enjoy the sensation it brings me. I really want to get one for myself to have and play with. This really makes me want to acquire or make a true school girl outfit as well. At the end of the year, I am happy to say that I am now a dollie to my friend CC, who is babygirl to AT, who is her Daddy. I will be starting off the year 2013 anew and Im sure it will be full of awesome surprises with the new relationship dynamic and the year itself.

I am officially spoiled by DK and CC. ^_^

So I can say, the fantasy thing I had like 2 journals ago was taken care of beautifully by DK and CC. I’m going on the “ask and you shall receive” frame of thought which has been proven true my entire life as long as what you are asking for is in reason. DK and CC truly wore my tush out and it was absolutely wonderful being with them. ^_^

Dinner…

Dinner was fun. I got there about five in the afternoon after leaving my house three times because I kept forgetting little things including my phone. I was thinking about the play date all day long and was more than excited. As a plus, I was going to make Panang curry, jasmine rice and peas for dinner with Thai tea. CC stayed in the kitchen with me while I cooked and we got to talk about little things and such. It was nice and I was letting her taste things and smell them as I finished them. I got to meet DK’s dogs who are all so adorably cute and very friendly. While I let the chicken marinate in the sauce some, I got to measure CC for me to fix her skirt and fixed a button on DK’s shorts for him. I had brought my sewing kit so I could do it while the food finished up. After I got done and before True Blood, I made us all plates and trust me, we ate very good. DK and CC went back for seconds on things, but I always only eat one plate majority of time as I never eat much anyway. When we finished and everything was put away, we moved to the play room.

Cuffs, rope and spanking…

It was exactly that. First, I was cuffed with a collar placed on me for the night by CC which was a first for me. Any previous play, I had been only cuffed at my wrists and ankles with a blind fold with anyone. That was the first time anyone had placed a collar on me even for play. Its had to explain the feelings I had about it being there. When it was placed and buckled, I felt my emotion change quickly. I was nervous some from the feeling it gave me, but it felt right at the same time. Like as I sat and waited, a sense of peace kind of swept over me. As we played, the only real discomfort I had was when I was tied to the bench and was standing while I lay on my stomach, which was mostly the tummy area that had the discomfort. Besides that, it was a great night. I can’t tell you when I slipped under in to subspace, but I flew hard that night. I actually cried that night as I was spanked until my cheeks were a burning numb and I shook. I remember something wet and cool on my skin then I was spanked again making the sting more. After what felt like forever as I was feeling so much and was seriously floating at this point, it stopped and I just laid there in bliss. I moaned softly at the touch on my back and there was moaning outside of my own. I was able to come down some as I lay there and then I felt stimulation again against my skin and I floated away again. Then next thing I can remember was buzzing along my lips and clit, my body shaking once more and moaning as I came. I can’t remember much after that point other than waking up, wrapped in a blanket on a pillow sleepily and hearing voices and then other sounds before rolling back over and passing out.

The next morning…

I woke up the next morning and after getting my head together enough, I went into the room with CC and curled under her. We watched TV as I finally got back down from my headspace that lasted through the night. I had forgotten that I still had on everything from the cuffs to the collar including the blindfold in my hair at that point. Eventually, I took them off and CC chuckled at me some for still having them on. It was nice cuddling under her before we finally got up for food. We came back and CC hit the shower as I gathered my things some so that I could be ready to leave when she left as well. When she got back, we cuddled again as we watched TV once more but she held me closer this time. Now I will say she totally started it and and will say I happily didn’t mind. I will just say we had some time to get to know each other a little better and leave it at that. When I finally made it home, I was happily tired and content from the entire weekend of fun.

After thoughts on the whole weekend…

AMAZING! Ok, I wasn’t expecting the weekend to be so full of bliss! Friday night has me floating so high as it was all subspace involved there as that tends to happen at The Mark. Sunday evening seemed more of a mix of subspace and some slavespace for me. I had a mixture of emotions and thoughts. I am so appreciative of DK and CC for being so amazing and great with me. I know I am not the most advanced person in the scene, but they are patient when playing with me. I feel so comfortable learning from them and playing with them as well. With them, I have built up more tolerance for pain and gotten to experience a few new things as well. It’s honestly nice and I couldn’t have imagine myself where I am now in scene a year ago. Kind of makes me smile with a happy tear at all the great people I have met and get to truly be myself around. I honestly cant wait to see what is to come from this point forward.

I’m officially feeling spoiled at the moment. ^_^ I really can hardly explain how awesome I feel to be active and be able to play with awesome people including being at an amazing establishment that allowed me to make all the great friends I have now.

Spanko Party Deux…

Though it was not as big a crowd as the 1st Spanko Party, it was fun for those of us who were there. I think the crowd was effected by The Mark opening at regular times again starting that night and the class the next day on whips. However, even though we had a small crowd for the night, oh did we have fun. Now I will say this ahead of time to get it out of my system; the music that night was not to par. Spanish guitar is great for outside the gallery but inside, there was a need for something with more beat. I kind of kick myself for not remembering my mix that I had planned to burn and give to The Mark that night and totally forgot it at home. Besides the music though for me, it was a very good night. Since DK had spoken with me earlier that week, we had made plans to play that night after midnight when he was more so free to do so. I mingled and more so hung out at the beginning of the night until it was time to play. Later, I found out it would be more so a spankorama, which comprised of two tops and three bottoms. Since it was more of a group session, I had not expected myself to go as deep as I did so I was quite surprised. We lined up the benches in a triangle somewhat and we got naked for DK and MsL, laying a blanket over the benches before we positioned ourselves on them.

Now I must take a moment to express this; Since I saw MsL play when I first came to The Mark, I wondered what it would be like to play with her. She enthralls a sense of excitement and awesome scariness as she is a Domme and rightfully so. Her presence is just like that and it’s always a great thing to watch her. To have a chance to play even partially with her sent chills up my spine as she was known (and I have seen with my own eyes) to have a heavier touch with or without anything in her hands. I wasn’t sure what to expect as I was afraid I would be too sore from Friday to play with DK and CC on Sunday if a hard bruise was made. However, I am happy to report she worked with DK awesomely well and made for a very deep experience for me.

Now DK warmed me up first. From his warm up, I actually expected to have good, but not a really intense spanking play especially since it was three of us and two of them. I was definitely wrong to think that as I forgot that the stronger control I feel, the deeper and quicker I will slip into subspace. My number one kink is D/s so it makes sense for myself to submit quicker. DK only stayed on me for a moment before I felt MsL’s hand and nails on my skin. Now she spanked me a few times and it was no warm up, but I liked it. Her hand made my cheeks sting and oh did I wiggle and move. She told me to stop moving away and hold still, which I complied quickly. I honestly loved the control even when some of the spanks were quite stingy. Then she would run her nails across my cheeks and I would moan instantly. It felt like going in circles of pain then pleasure over and over again. I was actually grateful that DK had came back over to me and hit my cheeks with the wooden spatula. If he hadn’t, I probably would have fell then. When I say fall, I truly mean it. MsL had pushed me very far and it was like someone pushed me off a cliff with no way of catching anything to stop it. I was happy that DK kind of caught me at the last moment and pulled me back. It was like he pulled me back on the cliff and made sure I was ready to really go over before leaning me back letting me slip down gently at the feel of paddles again.

As the switch up of tops happened once more, I was able to float gently down for a moment before MsL came back over to me. I went from floating down to falling again after she gave me “thuds” on my cheeks and ran her nails over me once more. My head rocked back and forth with her rhythm as I slipped away into deep space. I remember MsL whispering in my ear and I smiled. She asked me to look at her and I did until my head spun in pleasure as she would run her nails along me again. She occasionally teased my nipple through my bra and made me moan louder then I would feel another thuddy swat. I felt like I was a moaning heap on that bench barely conscious and I wanted to feel DK again. As soon as I felt his rhythm of paddling against me, I smiled so much. It was soothing and wonderful. With him, I totally let go and just let myself finally be taken over by the endorphins running through my veins. 

I don’t believe I have ever been so deep before in my life. I was there and was totally gone. I couldn’t feel my body for a long time, it just tingled. Even as I was able to open my eyes some, I could barely keep them open and it was like I was looking through someone else’s eyes. My body moved on its own and all I could do was watch through the small glances of blurry eyes, piecing bits together on how to control my own body again. The only thing I could barely feel in all of it was the warmth of DK. It was comforting and lead me back to myself again in a sense. I remember moving and everything jumbled. I felt cold and then trapped in myself then I cried. I couldn’t help the tears as I could barely do anything else. I wanted to apologize for going so far, for being so helpless, for just idk… I cried until DK came back and then teared more so afterwards for a good while. I had dropped and all I could do was lay there with still no strength, tearing at my own frustration. I wanted to sit up and move and talk, but it was still only with help could I move. I could only do any of it with help and I felt shy and cold afterwards kind of like a kid. While laying in the open area on M (who had played as well on my left but recovered a lot quicker than myself), I regained most of me to be functional and coherent again. When DK was able to come over again to check on me, I was talking and moving well from my perspective at the moment, but to make sure we went for breakfast afterwards. It was nice and the hot chocolate I had was great at warming back up. It was nice to talk with DK as well. I noticed a little bit of stagger still in my voice and could tell I was still not entirely back down from subspace. When I drove home, the lightest turns and lane changes made me a little light headed, but I am happy to say I made it home very much safety and literally floated off to sleep.

After thoughts…

Well unfortunately, those will have to wait. I decided to go ahead and write this particular journal the day after to give myself the room I will need for tomorrow. I have a fun evening planned with DK and CC as I will get to cook for them and then I get to be double topped. I’m looking forward to it and will actually post two more journals pertaining to this weekend, the third being the after thoughts of the entire weekend together. Though I will say this one thing I noticed; I go deeper when less warm up is done, but I can go longer when it is. Interesting development I’ve found and I’m not sure which one I would prefer and even wonder if a middle ground can be achieved. Though since Friday had me worked up quite a bit, I’m sure a warm up would be better appreciated than getting into it too soon. Until next time! ^_^